But Then What Happened?

On the Sunday following my break-up with Debi, I was surprised to see her pull up in the driveway of my brother’s house. I met her at the front door with a rather confused look on my face. She asked if she could come in. I hesitated before relenting. My brother Butch and his family were on vacation, so we were there alone. I wasn’t sure whether that was a good or a bad thing. I tactfully inquired as to the reason for her unexpected visit. She bluntly asked me if I would reconsider my decision to call off our wedding. And with equal bluntness, I said, “No.” She was persistent, and I could see that she wasn’t planning on leaving any time soon. I remained as patient and as sympathetic as was possible… but firm in my decision. She simply did not take “no” for an answer and trotted out every reason and employed every tactic imaginable. At times, I grew very frustrated and spoke firmly. I never wavered and eventually, reluctantly… she left… and I breathed a sigh of relief. ...

Because of work and ministry commitments, year number two of college, I moved out of my dorm and moved in with my brother, Butch and his family. I made the daily commute to school… nearly an hour each way. My daily ritual was to call Jan each day when I arrived home from school and we would make our plans for the evening… which usually meant we would hang out at her house or mine. Being a poor college student, I couldn’t afford to do much else. On this particular day, the ritual would be broken. I would call her, but there would be no “hanging out.” Tonight, I would break my promise to marry her. Adults don’t break up over the phone. Adults break up in person. Cowards break up over the phone. Today, the equivalent would be breaking up via text message or email. Time to man up. So, I broke up over the phone. Before you judge me too harshly, I fully intended to handle the touchy matter face to face. I really, really did. But the tenor of our conversation tipp...